Self-Guided Afterlife Connections





A Trial Experience with Connecting with the Afterlife

You are now going to go through the first effort to connect with someone on the next plane of life. As you go through this procedure, open yourself to whatever comes. That will help you become more attuned to the natural unfoldment that comes from the Source, your guides, and your loved ones on the next plane of life, you will try to make a connection now. Something may come to you: a sense of presence, a feeling of warmth and love, and even something more. Allow whatever comes to come. Don't try to make something happen. The experiences are like soap bubbles floating past you. If you reach out to draw one closer, as soon as you touch it, the bubble will pop. That is what will happen to your experiences if you try to make them become something you want or expect.

Remember this! Those we love on the other side are in charge of the experiences. They decide what to give us and they develop what comes. They create the experiences from whatever is in our minds that's coming up. If we judge, try to change, or otherwise do something with them, we're disturbing their effort to create messages and scenes for us. Then they have to start over. It's really important that we have the confidence that they're in charge and whatever comes to us is going to turn out to be what we need, even if to us it seems trivial, silly, or strange.

So if we see a moon over a mountain, they're either giving us the moon over the mountain or they're going to use it for the next unfoldment. If we get a bunny in a meadow, they gave that to us or they're going to use that to give us the unfoldment. If we get swirls of color or a sense of peace and calm it will be part of the unfoldment. They use whatever is coming up. So it's very important that you stay with whatever comes.

Connections may come in subtle feelings, senses, changes in your body, and a host of other things that are not pronounced or strong. Allow those feelings to unfold. Over time, with repeated sessions, your connection likely will become stronger. If you have no sense of anything, stay with the procedure. This is just one session, and you may have many sessions before you have a connection. If you don't have a connection, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with you or the person on the other side doesn't want to come to you. It just means that the conditions aren't right. You likely will need more sessions to let your connection mature.

Love: the Key that Unlocks the Door

The image at the top of each page in this procedure is of a door in the clouds and a hand holding a key. The key to connecting with people in the afterlife is LOVE!.

You are your mind, not the body you're using temporarily. The mind is not material; it can't be found somewhere. It is neither matter nor energy. It can never be seen, heard, felt, tasted, or smelled. It is timeless, spaceless, and eternal.

Thought is just bringing to awareness or into the present what mind has already experienced. It is just a crude representation of mind. Feelings are signals of the state mind is already in. Our mind is the source, and what we experience as mental processes are just the shadows cast by the mind.

However, one component of mind is not just a shadow. It is integral to mind, and itself is source. That component is love. Mind and love form whom we are and what we do in the physical realm. Thoughts, feelings, attitudes, personality, and all the rest of the mental stuff we associate with our selves are formed by the mind and love.

When love is allowed to flood the mind, we enter a higher state of being. We are actually a different person, on a different level of existence. Love is what transports us into higher planes. Lack of love drags us down into lower levels of being. Since we are only mind, not the body, we are actually transformed depending on the intensity of love that fills the mind. If love changed the body as it does the mind, when the mind is filled with love, the body would be radiant, beautiful, youthful, healthy, without aches or pains, and weightless--much like what we would envision an angel to be. If the mind blocks the natural inflow of love so the mind is filled with insensitivity, jealousy, anger, cruelty, violent thoughts, and all the feelings we associate with evil people, then the body would be misshapen, withered, wracked with pain, decrepit, and diseased--much like what we would envision the most wretched people on Earth to be.

The mind is like our image of an angel when it is filled with love. It is like our image of a wretched, misshapen person when it has no loving, compassionate feelings. We raise the mind's level to be more like an angel or celestial being when we are filled with love for others and we feel love from others flowing to us. We are different beings. This is often referred to as raising our vibration or raising our energy. However, it's easier to think of it as raising our love.

For us to be able to connect with our loved ones on the next plane of life, we must raise ourselves to a higher level of being while they lower themselves to come closer to the Earth plane. When we are able to be a person with that level of love, we connect. This training program will help you enter a place in your mind where love is. There, you will fill yourself with love for others, and you'll feel their love for you. Let that love infuse your spirit. That is how you will become the being for that moment that can connect with your loved one in spirit. You will find that it raises your level of being in the rest of your life as well. It will transform you.

This is an actual journal excerpt written by a woman who connected with her mother-in-law in spirit, whom she loves deeply. She describes the wise message her mother-in-law in spirit communicated to her during her Self-guided Afterlife Connection:

I went to my place in nature where I had visited with Ellen before. I recalled the feeling of being with her before. I remembered about having her walk through "the veil" and appearing before me, and she was there again. I was fully alert at that point, and my feelings of love and gratitude towards her came pouring out. We hugged each other, both smiling so happily.

Ellen laughed and said, "When are we going to lose that appearing through the veil part?" I asked her, "How can I make the connection more easily?" Ellen said, "Just feel the love." So I was feeling my love and gratitude for her very strongly. She said, "That's good, but I meant feel my love for you." It was easy for me to feel my love for her; it took an effort to allow myself to feel her love for me, but it came pouring in. I remembered all the times at her house where she took care of me and my daughter, always welcome, always well received, always a comfor bed, always a meal, always a smile, always wanting to sit down at the kitchen and visit, hear how I was doing, wanting to just be together, tending to my daughter... I don't know why she was so good to me, but I certainly could feel her love for me.

She said, "Love is always there, and it isn't just my love. It is the feeling of love from the Source, love from your higher self, love from all your guides and angels. That is always there waiting for you to feel, and when you allow that love to pour in, the connection will be available. I will always be there for you, the same as when I was in the physical. I will always love you, always care, always want to hear how you're doing, always want to help, always provide comfort and nurturing to you." During our visit whenever I wanted to go into something else, she kept bringing me back to the feeling, staying with that feeling of love, to remember this feeling, cultivate it and return to it often.

I asked her what kinds of things could I ask her for help with. She said, "Anything, but what do you most want?" I asked her could she help me understand about my strong desire to practice presence. She asked again, "What do you want, why do you want to practice presence?" I said to feel connected to higher self and source, to be at peace, to be alive in my life, to be awake to all that goes on around and in me, to become more of who I am, to understand better how to share that with others, help them feel connected, ultimately to know that I am loved, to know that they are loved, to be in joy. She said, "Feel the love that we are sharing now, and I believe you will have what you want. Live in that place of love as often as you can. Choose to feel it, call it forth, breathe it in, fill up with it."

Then I felt we were done with the visit. She wanted me to keep that feeling, that message, as primary, from our visit.

As you go through this experience, let the love flow freely into your mind. Forget yourself and become love. It will raise you into becoming the being filled with love that can connect with your loved one living in the afterlife.

You're Learning a New Language

You're learning how to communicate in a new language. We're not used to having someone communicate within our minds. We've been thinking, remembering, daydreaming, and talking to ourselves since we were children. That's like a language, and it's very familiar to us. Now, having someone else come in and start thinking and talking in that space in our minds is really different. It's like learning a new language. To be able to connect and communicate, we have to learn that new language. That takes time and it takes patience. You can't learn a new language by flying into a country, stepping off a plane, and spending a half hour with native speakers. You'll just be bewildered by what you hear. In the same way, you mustn't expect that you'll learn this new language of mind-to-mind communication in one session. Give it time. You're about to step off the plane into a new realm, and there, you'll receive thinking, remembering, and talking that is coming from outside of you. That's going to feel like what you're accustomed to getting as your thinking, remembering, and talking, but it's not coming from you.

To learn mind-to-mind communication, you have to learn how to allow that new communication to come to you, and you have to learn to accept it. Be patient. You'll learn how to communicate.

How Your Loved Ones Will Communicate with You

Your loved ones on the other side will connect with you and communicate in these unfoldments. You may be calling them "my imagination," but there's no "my" in them. It's all "them." This is very important. Those we love on the other side are in charge of the experiences. They decide what to give us and they develop what comes. If we judge, try to change, dismiss as unreal, or otherwise try to manipulate them, we are imposing our intentional mind on the free unfoldment coming from outside of us. That will disrupt their effort to create the images, thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and messages in our minds. They then have to start over. It's really important that we have the confidence that they're in charge and whatever comes to us is going to turn out to be what we need, even if to us it seems trivial or strange at the time.

Studies of people's reactions to calming pictures and disturbing pictures show that people's bodies start to react with calm to calming images or with stress to disturbing images about to be shown as early as seven seconds before the picture is shown, even though the person isn't aware of it. Their mind receives the message at a subliminal level and the body reacts correctly. When the person is asked to predict whether the picture coming up is calming or disturbing, their guesses are no more correct than would be expected by chance, and the measurement of their bodily reactions shows that their bodies are no longer reacting correctly to the picture that will come up. Their minds lost the message. In other words, when they start to use their intentional mind to guess what type of picture is coming, they shut down the message that normally comes telling the mind subliminally what the picture will be so that the body reacts correctly. The same thing happens when we start to try to control the experience of connecting with a loved one in spirit. We shut down the connection when we take control.

The Experience of Colors

We have been told by those on the other side that when we see colors sweeping through our consciousness during the experience, the colors are them communicating with us. A psychotherapists had an experiencer in a Guided Afterlife Connection describe what his loved one on the other side told her about colors. This is the experiencer's account:

While I was connecting to her and seeing her, she told me something very interesting. She said the colors experiencers see when they are inside are actually the loved one in spirit. They are showing the person here what they can do, how they are now as spirit. They don't wait to show up as the human face or body we are expecting. When the colors come, it is the loved one already there.

The Nature of the Messages

When we receive a message from someone on the Earth plane, that person makes sounds that are words by vibrating the air. The sound waves travel through the air, enter your ear and eventually get to your brain. The brain interprets the vibrations as words, and the mind makes a message from the words. The words drop off and the message remains.

When we get the vibrations from someone's speaking on the Earth plane, males generally have lower voices and females higher. Aunt Rose sounds different from Dad. And Mom sounds different from Aunt Rose, even though she's Aunt Rose's sister. The vibrations are different because each person has different vocal chords, mouth shape, nasal cavities, and the rest of what makes a voice sound unique.

However, when we get the communications from our loved ones, guides, higher selves, and the Source, they come mind to mind, so there are no sounds and there are usually no words (although sometimes words come to mind). We just receive the messages. These messages have the qualities of memories or daydreaming, not the experiences of seeing, hearing, and feeling we're accustomed to when we communicate with someone in the physical world. The thoughts from them come to us as our thoughts do. We may then create words from the messages using our inner voice. That is what makes it difficult at first to see the difference between your thinking or imagination and their messages--it's the same inner voice we've thought with since we were children. We have to get past feeling like their messages should come in the voices they used on the Earth plane. They usually don't. They usually come without words at all. They come in fully formed messages in the mind.

So it's a very normal part of the training in this Self-guided Afterlife Connections procedure to go through having to get over the mistaken notion that what's coming into your mind is "just imagination." That will happen when you experience having images, thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and messages come to you that you just couldn't originate. The more you experience that, the more confident you'll become that the messages are coming from them, and the messages will flow more smoothly. Be patient. Learning mind to mind communication is like learning to speak a new language. But you will learn it if you just trust and allow the unfoldment to teach you.

Now, having said that, experiencers occasionally report that they hear clear words spoken in their minds, with the sound of the voice the person in spirit used on the Earth plane. That may happen for you also, but that isn't the usual way of communicating that those on the other side use.

The Sense of Presence Is Real

Along with the mind-to-mind communication, you will have a sense of presence. You will just know that person you want to connect with is there. It's as real as the senses of seeing and hearing. So when you're getting the mind-to-mind communication, you'll get this very real sense of their presence. You may not see anything. You won't "hear" with your ears. But the knowledge that they're with you is a very reliable validation that you're connected.

Images and Scenes

In the same way, our loved ones, guides, higher selves, and the Source bring images and scenes to us. They may seem irrelevant at the time, as though they were just passing fantasies. When you allow free unfoldment, you may be given a variety of images and scenes. They come mind to mind, bypassing the eyes, ears, skin, and brain. The result is the same experience in the mind as if the body had been involved, but since the body limitations aren't there, what comes is fluid, easily changed, and not limited to mundane physical realities. They may seem to jump around or be in fragments. That's because in the mind our loved ones, guides, higher selves, and the Source can take us from scene to scene easily and immediately to get messages to us, so they take advantage of that unrestricted ability.

They often give participants experiences instead of words. Instead of telling the participant something, they guide them into experiencing it. This is an illustration from a participant's journal of what happened when she asked for a message:

I asked Ben if he had any messages for me, and just because I asked, he said "come on". We jumped into a golf cart lol and meandered off . The golf course we started on became more like a safari. We got to a very tall and thin mountain, with people on either slope slogging away, getting to the top. Ben was laughing and said "I'll show you something". He went to a secret door in the bottom of the mountain, and it was an elevator! We both got in it, and were quickly at the top. "Sometimes people make it so hard for themselves" he said. The understanding I got from that, was that it was referring to our efforts to "get to" the other side and communicate. My medium friend is always telling me I'm trying too hard, thinking too much.

Your loved ones, guides, higher selves, or the Source could have said, "Well, you're trying too hard and thinking too much," but instead, this participant was given the experience that allowed her to discover the truth that she was trying too hard to make the communication happen; she should just take the elevator and let it convey her to where she wants to go. The teaching often happens in experiences and senses of messages, not in words. The reason is that participants receive the messages mind to mind, not in the vibrations of words.

They are in charge of the images and scenes as well the messages. Allow them to unfold naturally, even if they seem irrelevant.

Positive Experiences

All of the experiences you will have with your loved one will be positive. They are ALWAYS filled with love and a concern for the person living on the Earth plane. If you ever had an experience or feeling that is negative, such as feeling the person on the other side shunned you or told you something disturbing or anything else negative, that wasn't from them. That unfoldment has come from fears and negative emotions we all have while on the Earth plane that have taken over your mind. Or they could be from sources other than our loved ones, guides, higher selves, and the Source. Push them aside and say, "That's not from _____ (your loved one). I put that in the trash." Think of putting that in a trash can. Then go back to your meditation and communication. That is very unlikely to happen. I just want you to know your communications will ALWAYS be positive, and if something isn't, then it didn't come from your loved one. Throw it in the trash.

Although the approach to you will be positive, your loved one may feel negative emotions about what has happened to him or her, or about your separation. Your loved one may be very sad at not being in the physical world with you, or may be frustrated that something is happening in the family, or may even be angry at some injustice. The person has the same personality, loves, fears, intolerances, humor, and all the rest of what makes them an individual that they had on the Earth plane. They are the same person. And so, you might see them come to you crying over something, or frustrated about something. However, their approach to you will be full of love and concern. They have grown out of much of the pettiness they may have felt while in the body. The transition off of the Earth plane is a life-changing event! It just results in changed sentiments, but not because the person is transformed in an instant. It's just that they've experienced something that changes their attitude.

You Must Have No Expectations

We hope that this procedure eventually will enable you to connect with your loved one. You may have read the accounts of people who have had successful connections. However, successful connections require patience and time. You must not go into your first experiences expecting a connection. If you anticipate a connection, that will block the flow of free unfoldment that eventually will result in the connection. You must be willing for the entire session to be receiving impressions, images, and other experiences that don't seem to have any meaning. You must allow them to come in their own time, in their own way. When you're getting images or impressions that aren't meaningful, don't think "But where is she? I want to connect and she's not here!" That will shut down the free unfolding and you will actually block your own connection. The meaningless experiences are part of the process.

Your Loved One or Your Guide Has Experiences or a Message to Give You

This is the central point you must remember as you go through the Stage 3 exercise. Your loved one or your guide has experiences or a message to give to you. They are waiting for you to relax and give up control so they can give you what they have planned. If you keep control or intend to have something happen or expect to have a connection as you envision it, you block the activity or message they have waiting for you. You can't make it come. You have to allow it to come. You must give up control, no matter how much you want a connection. They can only give you what they already have planned for you when you let them take control, and you give up making something happen.

Let the Doubt Flow Past

It's natural and normal to have occasional doubts about when the unfoldment is from your loved one. Our culture is so spiritually backward that we were reared to doubt the reality of our eternal lives, even though the religions teach about eternal life. We all continue to second guess what we're getting from someone living on the next plane of life. Just remember that unfoldment isn't coming from you. If you were trying to create the communication, you'd have to think about the content, then think about the words your loved one would use, then decide if they're the right ones, then change the wording; it would be like writing a novel. It would take you hours to get a few sentences together.

The unfoldments flow just like a conversation because they are a real conversation. You'll learn that the messages couldn't be coming from you. That will become more obvious to you over time. But don't feel you're not doing well because of the doubts. They're natural and normal.

Invoking Protection

In the unseen world that is intertwined with this world, there are all types of people. Look at the Earth plane today. You'll see some people who are loving and compassionate, and some who are cruel and sociopathic. When they pass away, they are still the same people. Sometimes, a person who isn't so nice stays on the Earth plane, here and real, but unseen. When you open yourself to communicate with your loved ones, you need to ask for protection so you communicate only with your loved ones. In the relaxation meditations you'll listen to, you'll hear about the white light of protection pouring over you. The purpose is to protect you from these negative influences. You then don't need to worry about them.

Prepare for the Session

You should have set aside 15 to 30 minutes of time when you are in a quiet area without interruptions. Bring no cell phones to the area. Tell your family or others living with you that you are not to be disturbed. You should be wearing comfor clothing, preferably without belts or other restrictions. A jogging suit is ideal. You should be sitting in a comfor chair or recliner, not laying down.

Have in mind someone who has left the Earth plane and now lives on the next plane of life. The person or pet must be significant for you. It shouldn't be someone you know of, but don't have a relationship with, such as an actor or historical figure. You may be grieving for this person or pet, or you may have someone in mind you aren't grieving for, but have a close relationship with.

You're participating in the Center for Spiritual Understanding's research to help humankind make connections with people on the next planes of life. When you started, you agreed that to have access to the recordings, you would fill out a journal describing what happened to you in this experience. After you've gone through these recordings, please follow through with your agreement by writing in the journal as explained at the end of this page.

IMPORTANT: Don't lay down. Don't recline in a recliner. Be rested and relaxed before the session. Sit upright in a chair.

The Recordings

The sound bars below will play the recordings in Windows Media, Real Player, or Quicktime, depending on which media player you have installed.

Now, put on the earphones and click on the "Play" arrow on one of the sound bars to listen to the recording. It is the second symbol on the sound bar. Adjust the volume on your computer so the sound is comfor to you.


If the Recordings Don't Play for You

If you have tried to link to the recordings and none play for you, click on this link to download the recordings: Download the Recordings.






Stage 5

You have just finished listening to the recording in which you experienced unfoldment. Now, click on the link below to go to Stage 5. The user name is afterlife and password is alive.

Stage 5
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